Saying Thanks

Saying thank you or otherwise expressing gratitude is an incredibly simple gesture, but it’s one that is disappearing rapidly in our need-it-now culture.  In the age of instant gratification, the value of a “thank you” seems to be getting lost in the rush of things.

Last night, I got a nice reminder that gratitude is not yet a lost art:

I write for Shannon’s blog, A Girl’s Gotta Spa, and I know how busy she is. Even though the comment couldn’t have taken more than a few seconds to write, it says a lot that she took the time out of her day just to say thanks. I had a rough few days at work myself, so this simple thanks was enough to totally make my week.

It’s a good thing to keep in mind. Is there anyone you’ve forgotten to thank or tell them how much they’re appreciated?

Let them know before the weekend is over.

Reciprocity

What does Twitter have in common with friendships and romantic relationships? A  lot, actually…but the main commonality is the importance of reciprocation. It’s a fine balance to strike, but this give and take is key to building and sustaining relationships both on and off the web.

A lack of appropriate give and take  both in professional and personal relationships is wasted energy….and with our busy lives, I don’t think many of us can afford to waste our precious time.

Twitter is a perfect example of ideal reciprocation.

Imagine you have a favorite clothing brand, and wanted to know when their next season launch was. When the brand responds to your tweet with a polite, helpful, or even humorous response, you’re that much more likely to be wear brand clothing, shop at their stores on the launch date, etc. Conversely, if you tweet constantly and receive no help or response, you might feel much more negatively towards the brand.

ZaarlyNYC, an online marketplace network, is another great example of reciprocity and interaction. A few weeks ago I had only a vague clue what Zaarly was, but I learned very quickly after a few exhanges with the company’s Twitter handle.

You’ll notice how they never once pushed their product onto me, but after engaging on a personal level I found myself wanting to know more about Zaarly. They’re active, engaging, and they reciprocate – a social media A+ in my book. Not to mention, most recently they were featured on Mashable for being one of the top 6 startups to look out for in 2012.

The framework for these examples of reciprocity remain relatively the same across the board. I’ve learned two things from this:

1.     Make sure YOU are reciprocating appropriately. It’s easy to place blame, but if you aren’t fulfilling your end of the deal, you simply cannot set unrealistic standards for your counterpart. For example: You can’t rush a web designer to finish new graphics if you haven’t fully provided him/her with the necessary information to create such content.

2.     Know when to move on.  Recognize when and where you should devote your time – if the source is unresponsive, unproductive, or otherwise unsatisfactory despite numerous attempts on your part to change or stimulate the situation, move on.  It’s time to create, produce, connect, and discuss with people and businesses who are willing to share in your creative energy.

What has been your experience with reciprocity on Twitter? What other facets of the social network do you feel are important?

The 4 Hour Workday.

Every so often whilst stumbling through the internet, I’ll come across an article about the 9-5 work day. Most articles beg the same few questions - What is the real value of a workweek? Will a 9-5 day become a thing of the past?

There’s growing support behind the idea of a four hour workday. Proponents of this uber-short day believe that if you nix all distractions — coffee breaks, water cooler chats, social media interactions — for four hours, you will allow yourself to completely focus on the task(s) at hand. In a perfect world, your concentration is at 110%, and you’re out the door by noon.

I get that.

I love the “get it done” mentality, and I love even more that a four hour workday would allow me extra time to spend with family and friends. The 4 hour workday concept raises some very real questions, and I’ve even tested the idea out for myself when I used to work from home. Depending on the work load…this a 4 hour day can work. If I have a day of strictly writing and researching, four solid, focused hours is the perfect amount time to get all of my work done. However, that’s not my typical day  and it’s certainly not the typical day for most other communicators.

As much as I would like for this concept to take off universally, I believe that it’s completely unrealistic in a communications setting. Why?

1. Communicators crave interaction. Come on people…we’re human. We want to talk, to socialize, to interact. Imagine going to work every day (albeit for only 4 hours) without saying a word to anyone. No catching up on your coworker’s weekend or asking about their holiday celebrations — your purpose is focus, and focus alone. No socialization.

I know that may be a bit extreme, but the point I’m trying to make is that a workplace is, in essence, your second home. You spend a lot of time there…would you really be able to shut out everyone in your surroundings for four hours?

2. We can’t remove ourselves from social media. As  communications professionals, we can’t (or really, we shouldn’t) just unplug after only four hours. I know from personal experience that a regular 9-5 never is just that — thanks to office Blackberrys and the internet, most people can work from anywhere, at any time. In my opinion, shutting down completely would be irresponsible in a sense.

As communications professionals, we have a responsibility to know what’s going on. We have a responsibility to be engaging, to inform, and to be informed.

3. How much more time are we really gaining? Some people will probably disagree with me on this one, but I don’t know if we would really be gaining all the time we think we would. Yes…I would die for an extra hour or two to sleep in in the morning. I would love to have time for a full workout every day. I would like to have a little more “me” time.

But being a devil’s advocate… I can easily solve all of those problems myself without cutting my day short. I could take 20 minutes out of every day to get organized, so that I don’t wind up with hours worth of cleaning and organizing taking away from said “me” time at the end of the week. I could go to bed an hour  or two earlier. Then, I could wake up rested and with an hour to go to the gym.  There – I gained time without sacrificing my productivity and I guarantee I’d feel a heck of a lot better

What do you think – have you ever tried out a 4 hour work day? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Resolutions.

I have a love-hate relationship with New Year’s resolutions.

On one hand, I love this universal acceptance of the “blank slate” concept – it amazes me that millions people around the world recognize January as  a jumping off point  for renewal, for a second chance, for motivation. As a concept, it’s awesome.

But being the devil’s advocate that I am, I have to ask…how many people really follow through with their resolutions?  Sure, we all know someone who heard of someone’s mother’s best friend’s daughter’s teacher who resolved to lose 15lbs and actually followed through, but really…I don’t personally know a single person who followed through on their resolutions.

I like to think of a  resolution as something permanent – you resolved to make a lasting change.

It’s simply human nature to set optimistic standards  – I think it’s called the optimistic probability bias, if my college education serves me right. I’m not saying I’m a pessimist, and I am by no means trying to negate the excitement or promise of a New Year. I’m just being realistic.New Years Resolutions are a load of crap.

This year, I’ve decided to give up making New Year’s resolutions.

Instead, I’m finally making my bucket list – a real, honest list of things I want to do before I kick it (hopefully not too soon).  And I also hope that by this time next year, I’ll have crossed some things off the list, and maybe even added some more.

In no particular order…

1. Work for Google

2. Write a thank you letter to every person who has inspired me – real, hardworking people. Not celebrities.

3. Donate a significant amount to the Best College In The World 

4. Be my own boss.

5. Go on a Safari  - bonus points if I can touch a lion.

6. Be my own, superwoman hybrid of Kelly Ripa meets Ann Curry

7. And to that point, work for NBC again. Or ABC, period. 

8. Eat a bug, Survivor-style

9.  Own a bulldog (Preferably named King Leonidas)

10. Cook a meal so delicious it will bring Giatta De Laurentiis to tears

11. Build a well in Ghana

12. Write or co-write a book

13.  Dance again

14. Avoid receiving a speeding ticket for a 10-year stretch…wish me luck.

15.  Maintain my blog for an entire year, with at least one post a week

16.  Give my 230lb boyfriend a piggyback ride

17. Travel to India

18. Travel to Greece

19. Travel to Japan

20.  See the Northern Lights

21. Write a blog or article that changes someone else’s opinions

22. Write a blog or article that changes my own opinions

23.  Do a yogathon/zumbathon/any –athon that doesn’t start with “mar”

24.  Successfully bake rose-flavored macaroons good enough to give Laduree a run for their French money.

25.  Pay for at least a part of my youngest sister’s college tuition

26. Write for a living beyond freelancing

A College Lesson In Crisis Communications

Of all the mornings out of the year that I can sleep in, today was not supposed to be one of them.

Today, I was supposed to get up at around 5:30 to make sure I’m entirely packed for the next two weeks of my life. I won’t be back in Poughkeepsie for awhile (splitting my time between NJ, PA, NYC, & North Carolina), so it was reaaaaallly important that I woke up early and made sure I was all set.

That didn’t happen. What happened was my roommate Jenn and I waking up at 6:52, screaming SH-T, and promptly running around like Olympic track stars, rushing to load her car up and book it to the train station to make the 7:26 from Poughkeepsie. Thankfully we made it, but as we were rushing around… I got to thinking.

As rushed as we were, as awful as it was that we woke up late, we still had a plan. For a minute, I felt like we were the pit crew at a Nascar race – while we were definitely in a crunch, we weren’t scrambling. We didn’t choke.  We knew we screwed up, and immediately went into overdrive to do what we needed to do: get out of bed, get to the train station, and we didn’t forget a thing.

And really,  isn’t that exactly what crisis communications is all about?  Efficiency and timeliness. There isn’t room to fumble, there isn’t room to complain and waste more time. Own up to the mistake, rectify it, and do it well. At least, that’s what I’ve gleaned from the case studies I’ve read. Actually, this morning also reminded me of a book I read, Clutch by Paul Sullivan. It’s all about how people react in high-pressure situations — do you choke, or are you “clutch”, able to react fast and perform?

So, was it a complete crisis situation? For a stressed-out, commuting intern, a little bit. In the big scheme of things, probably not…but it’s good to get some practice.

Have you ever ran into a situation like this?

A Lenten Resolution

Lent is a time that most people dedicate to giving up a personal vice. Currently, my two major vices are Frank’s Red Hot Sauce and coffee, neither of which I’m ready to give up just yet. I know, I know…but serious addictions like this need to be dealt with in stages. I can’t bring myself to just stop cold turkey!

I digress.

What I’m getting at is that Lent doesn’t have to be about giving something up. It can also be a time to enhance an aspect of your personal life. And for me, I choose my blog. This blog, which I’ve been seriously neglecting. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been blogging up a storm… just not on my own personal site. I write 5 posts a week for Pierce Mattie PR’s corporate blogs, and I’ve just hopped on board the team at Fashables. (Which, by the way is an awesome blog that I highly suggest checking out).

Still, I think it’s important to take the time to talk about my reactions to what’s trending du jour. And not just react, but engage. I love the engagement aspect of social media — I’ve met so many talented professionals from Twitter, and I want to keep the interaction flowing, creating conversation and getting inspired by what other people have to say, too.

I just got back from a #Maristsocialmedia event with Social Media expert Chris Dessi (@cdessi), who is by far one of the most inspiring speakers I’ve listened to. I’ve been told for the past three years to blog, pick a topic, and stick to it. But realistically, I’m not just into fashion. I’m not only interested in beauty products, fitness, or whatever else I may be writing about. I’m into social media, pop culture, and what’s going on in the world. Chris is outrageously successful, and he’s done it simply by being himself. In a nutshell, that’s what I intend to do, too. My posts might vary, but I’ll promise to keep them at least mildly entertaining.

So, that’s what this is. Picking up where I left off and reacting to the world around me. That’s where I’m going with this whole thing….so expect lots of posts, #trendingtopics, and because I’m an unashamed ham,  a few vlogs here and there.

As always, find me on Twitter and Linkedin.

The motherland.

Paree holds the key to my heart….and so does the flagship Louis Vuitton store. It’s almost as good as a museum — my friends and I sat on a couch on the second floor for a good 20 minutes just staring at the signature luggage trunks. It’s a fashion lover’s dream, and a broke college chick’s nightmare. What a catch 22….welcome to my life.

xxxxx!

Oh, London…

Hi guys…so this past weekend I was in Paris, but I came back today because I had tickets for the London Eye. I wanted to share the view with you all — it’s kind of loud in the background because there were a ton of people in our observation bubble, but you still get an awesome view of my favorite city. Enjoy

 

 

 

 

 

 

month one.

So…I’m here. After months of preparation and anticipation, I’m finally living in London. Nestled in the heart of South Kensington, my quaint little fourteen-person flat has quickly become a home away from home. The area is fabulous — a Lamborghini dealership is just around the corner, policemen drive BMW’s, and women are dripping with the latest fashion trends (faux fur galore).  But  ritzy South Ken isn’t just a wealthy neighborhood, it’s  so rich in culture as well. There’s museums, parks, international restaurants, and a few colleges all within a ten minute walk. It’s completely overwhelming…with so much to do in just my area, it’s often hard to decide what my daily adventures will entail. I’ve waited a full month to blog about London, partially because I was too busy out exploring, but also because I wanted to give myself a little time to really internalize everything that’s been going on these past thirty days. Basically, what I’ve come up with is this…

LONDON IS AMAZING.

Despite having the absolute WORST plane ride I have ever experienced (think multiple delays,  unnecessary bus transfers, thoughts of throwing myself off of the double decker, etc), we arrived here in one piece. After lugging a good 130lbs of luggage up 6 flights of steps — there’s no “lifts” in my building — we began to get acquainted with our neighborhood. Like I said, this neighborhood is fabulous. just… so gorgeous.

In terms of classes, I’m in love. I’m a closet Shakespeare nerd, so London is basically my dream come true in that sense. My Comtemporary Brit Theatre course requires that I go and see one major play per week, and my Brit Culture class gives me exactly the culture history I’m looking for. The professors in the UK are incredible– they genuinely care about how we experience London.  Grades are obviously still important, but they value the way in which you achieve the grade, rather than just making sure you get that A…just one of the major differences I’ve noticed between British and American schooling. I love that instead of tying us down to a classroom, the professors regularly take us for walks around the city, showing us little bits of history that would have otherwise gone unnoticed by the uniformed eye.

So much has happened that it’s hard to recount everything here….so instead, I’ll throw some pictures at you. Explanations will come. And from now on I’ll start recounting my experiences better instead of waiting an entire month.

I know…we’re walking cliches, but it had to be done.

Some wierd alien-built rocks….OK, it’s Stonehenge.

Gratuitous, but DELICIOUS.

Bath…So beautiful.

AMSTERDAM. I’ll recap this one in my next blog entry.

Me & Madison breakin’ it down in VIP

South Ken Tube station! Love it.

In Picadilly after seeing 39 Steps

Chihuly @ the V&A…bad picture but I LOVE him.

THE GLOBE. I died a little.

And yet another cliche.

I’ll keep updating this time..I swear! Up Next: Culture Shock.

college & beyond.

College: The best four years of your life.

It’s a pretty bold statement.  It’s something we’ve heard from friends and family time and time again. But is it true?

Part of me  S  C  R  E  A  M  S   yesyesyes,ABSOLUTELYYES.

But every time I hear that phrase, I get a little sad. The best four years… of my entire life? If that’s true, it means I have about a year and a half until my prime time is up and I begin my downward spiral into a boring abyss. And when I look at it like that, I hate that phrase. It’s inaccurate. So, So, So, inaccurate.

Don’t get me wrong, college so far has been amazing. I love Marist – love it. I mean, if every aspect of Marist College could be combined and put into a human being, I would marry it. That’s how much I love it. I love the library, I love the green, I even love the crazy squirrels that run around like they’re on crack.

But seriously, I feel completely at home at Marist … not only have I found a great group of friends, but I can honestly say I enjoy most of my courses – something I consider a rarity.  In the past three years I’ve learned more about myself and the “real world” than I could have ever imagined, and with my trip abroad to London quickly approaching, I can only imagine the adventures that are in store. I’m really lucky, and when I think about all the great times I’ve had so far, yes, this has been the best two and a half years of my life. So far.

I just think that saying college is the best four years of your entire LIFE, is a little bit narrowminded. My whole life? Really??

Right now, I’m still making mistakes (but don’t tell anybody)  and learning how to deal with the consequences. We all are at this age…and while that’s the beauty of the colliegate experience, I don’t necessarily want to label it as “the best four years” of my entire life. Its some of the best times, for sure. But I’m honestly really, really excited for what’s ahead. After graduation an entirely new chapter opens, and it’s one that I’m excited for. I’ve worked hard and I can confidently say that my future is bright – so don’t the years ahead deserve the same credit that’s been awarded to my college years? I’m more than confident that I’ll be having great experiences after I graduate, too…honestly, that’s the whole reason I’m so against labeling college as the best times of our entire lives.

Why should we limit ourselves like that?

When I’m a hundred and twenty years old and on my deathbed, I want to look back and be proud of my life. When I think about my “best” years,   I truly hope I’m thinking about  the friendships made  and the experiences I’ve had at Marist. But I also hope my “best years” include the accomplishments and the good times in the years that followed college, too. The years that I accomplished my goals, the years that I traveled, the years that I cherished with family and friends. And of course, college will be a huge part of those “best” years of my life…but I hope there will be many, many more “bests” to come.